Country-Fried Mama

A Yankee “mutha” raising kids in the deep, deep, DEEP South

A lot can happen in 15 years

Posted by CountryFriedMama on Feb-27-2009

Just when I was about to quit Facebook — divorcing myself from requests to list my 50 favorite types of cereal, to test my knowledge of Adam Sandler movies, to get my butt kicked in Scrabulous by people who know words like “qat” — along come a half a dozen friends I haven’t heard from in years.

This always seems to happen in bursts.  Months will go by in which I get sick and tired of the senseless responsibilities of maintaining my Facebook account, and then suddenly, hey, there’s Cathy from my PR job in Cambridge!  Hey, L.D. and Boogie from college!  A friend request from my high school swim coach!

I’m always excited when these requests pop up in my e-mail, but the reconnections are, unfortunately, usually superficial.  It’s hard to catch up after five years, 10 years, 15 years, especially via wall-to-wall communication.

I want to let all these folks know what I have been up to since they knew me.  I’m no longer the single working girl/insecure college freshman/terrible backstroker they once knew.  Now I’m a neurotic stay-at-home mom with two kids and I live in the deep, deep DEEP South.  (This is always the most shocking part of my story.  “How did you end up THERE?” my newly found friends ask.)

My response makes me feel like that woman in the Mirena commercial.  You know the one: she’s a perky blond in front of a perfect family, perfect house, talking about her perfect IUD.  “A lot can happen in five years…Get a promotion…Buy a house…Move to Memphis…Finish a book…Finish a sentence!”

I want to explain to my Facebook pals how I got here, but I can’t adequately do it in a short message. “A lot can happen in 15 years…Graduate from college…Fall in love with a co-worker…Move around the country…Quit three careers…Have two babies…Finish the laundry…Finish a blog post!”

But when I write a long message, I always wonder, “Does so-and-so really want this much detail about the last decade of my life?” Unlikely.

Delete, delete, delete.

Facebook has been good to me, I suppose.  I’m happy when old friends find me, even if our rekindled relationships are too often limited to snarky status updates and virtual snowball fights.  And my Facebook friends talked me out of getting a Kate Gosselin-esque haircut.  Thanks for that, guys.

I am so psyched to know you again Cathy, L.D., Boogie, Sue, and all of you who have (sort of) reappeared in my life.  I would rather go out for coffee with you than assign you quizzes demanding that you “Name That Disney Character!” or send you political flair like, “Democrats are sexy.  Who ever heard of a nice piece of elephant?”  But since I have removed myself to a city which you are not likely to ever visit, I suppose it will be hard for us to meet up at Starbucks and truly reconnect.

I’ll settle for Facebook, and be happy that we have some kind of friendship again.  And please feel free to poke me if you ever fear I am about to make an unfortunate hair decision.

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  1. KathyB! Said,

    That’s too funny as I am sitting here at my computer reading blogs and flipping back over to FB in between to see what’s happening over there. ((sigh)). It really isn’t all that meaningful (don’t get me started on the wretched 25 things!!) but you’re right, it’s better than nothing…

  2. Bubbe Said,

    haven’ t figured out how to respond on Twitter, but just wanted to remind you about the times during the sirens you had to run to the bathtub (in the other house).

  3. ck Said,

    I was so excited when a huge group of people from my high school graduating class showed up on facebook…until they started posting photographs of me that I didn’t realize were in circulation. Um, western-themed group shots from Great Adventure circa ‘96? NOT COOL.

  4. Gibby Said,

    LOL, I am addicted to FB. I always find myself telling my mom odd tidbits and she will ask how I know and I usually respond, “Facebook.” Then she asks if I ever talk to these people. Huh? TALK to them? What are ya, nuts????

  5. CountryFriedMama Said,

    ck: There is a photo on Facebook of me at a college party I have no recollection of ever attending. Scary…

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